Are you considering going to a marriage counsellor because you and your spouse are having problems? This is sometimes the only thing that can prevent two people that actually do love each other from parting ways and filing for divorce. It is something that can tear apart entire families when two people are simply not getting along.
There might be some important strategies that these counsellors can provide which will help you restore your marriage. If this is something that you are currently going through, here are some expectations of marriage counselling that you should experience while you are visiting with these professionals.
What Is A Marriage Counsellor?
A marriage counsellor is an individual that is able to look at both sides of the situation, specifically the opinions and feelings of two people that are married. They can sometimes bring both individuals together, helping them see both points of view in an attempt to prevent a separation or even a divorce.
These counsellors have gone through specific training, and will likely have many years of experience. It is very common for them to have associates that also work with them. If one of them cannot help, the other might be able to, allowing them to bounce ideas off of each other until they can help these individuals find some type of resolution.
Look for a marriage counsellor who has specific training and possibly be registered psychologists; then aim to develop an effective therapy alliance in order to achieve your goals.
What Should Your Expectations Of Marriage Counselling Be?
Expectations of marriage counselling need to be aligned with the goals you are trying to achieve, the participation you are willing to engage in and how motivated you are to achieve your goals. Ensuring you have found an experienced marriage counsellor and a good therapy relationship and that have taken the time to express how you feel then the sessions can help you make the right decision.
How Do You Find a Recommendation
It is always helpful to receive a recommendation from a trusted source. This can be family or friends, or this can be from a health professional like a GP who knows the reputation of counsellors in the local area. Use the organisation website to check out the profiles of those you like the look and sound of. This is a really good start to finding the right person.
Which One Should You Choose?
Any marriage counsellor that has exceptional feedback is one that you should consider. There are a few other factors to think about as well. For example, if you are going to see this counsellor on a regular basis, it’s a good idea to choose one that’s close to where you live. It’s also necessary to see how much they will cost and if they are actually covered by your insurance.
If it doesn’t cost you any money, this is going to be a huge factor in whether or not you use these professionals. Finally, after looking at their profile, how much they will cost, and where they are located, you need to actually feel comfortable with the marriage counsellor. You can set an initial appointment, and if it doesn’t go very well, you always have others that you can try out.
What Should You Expect After Your First Visit?
The first visit that you have with a marriage counsellor is really not going to straighten things out. It’s more of them getting to know you and you explaining your story. It’s only after this appointment that you will start to see some progress where both you and your spouse will begin to implement certain suggestions that they give in order to help save the marriage. Additionally, this is where you will determine if this is the right person for you are not.
If you feel that they are not the right fit, or if they are not helping at all, it’s time to move on and try somebody else. Expectations for marriage counselling should only be based upon subsequent visits after the first one. You need to give this at least a month, visiting with them every week, to see if things can straighten out.
If nothing is happening after several weeks, and things are still the same at home, you might need to switch to a new marriage counsellor as soon as you can. There is always the probability that no matter what type of counselling or person you see that the marriage is not at the point of being saved however hopefully if you go quick enough there are some helpful things you can still do.
In conclusion, the expectations for marriage counselling that you have should always be initially positive. You have to go into these situations believing that something is going to work out. If both you and your spouse want to fix things, getting them back to how they work, then there is a higher possibility that this is going to be beneficial for the both of you.
Yet, if you are both going in with the idea that you are simply going through the motions, then it’s likely not going to work at all. Just make sure that you properly evaluate each of the marriage counsellors that provide this type of service before choosing one for your initial visit. And finally, always be open to the idea of switching to another one if you both feel that this person is not helping you at all, and you truly want to work things out.