There are a number of reasons people choose relationship counselling. It is a common misconception that relationship counselling is applicable only for couples who are having some problems in their relationship. In fact, relationship counselling is also used by sales executives, marketing executives, family members and a number of other people who want to better their relationships with their counterparts.
Therefore, if you are having persistent issues in your relationship, it can be helpful to utilise the services of a professional to improve things. Hundreds of thousands of people all over the world take advantage of this form of therapy irrespective of their age, race or orientation. However, it is important that you consider the following relationship counselling aspects to be mindful of your expectations.
Relationship counselling does work but it’s not a miracle pill that will sort out the issues in a 30 min session. The people involved in a relationship need to work on it but counselling can help in accelerating the process.
Relationship Counselling Principles
Here is a list of some of the important relationship counselling aspects you need to consider to get the best out of your counselling experience.
Every Relationship Has Issues
One of the most important things you need to realise is that every relationship has issues and it is completely normal to have issues in our relationship. It may feel like that other people do not have any issues but that’s not true. Human beings are emotional and their emotions sometimes get the better of them.
One of the most common misconceptions about relationships is that everyone should be is able to sort out their issues on their own. It is also a misconception that asking for expert help is a waste of time and money and no expert can help a relationship.
Counselling experts have a lot of experience in dealing with relationship issues and can help in bringing out people’s true feelings that the individuals may not realise.
It Takes Time to Work
As mentioned in the beginning, relationship issues take some time to work. There are no quick fixes and if there is a quick fix, it is not going to last long. It is a process where you will need to work on the process to get something out of it. Some couples can get their issues sorted out in a few sessions whereas others may require our large number of sessions to get over their issues. Also, it is important to keep in mind that counselling may not work if the individuals involved in a relationship are not willing to work to sort out their issues.
One of the biggest mistakes made by people when they’re undergoing counselling is that they try to fix things out of fear or guilt. The counsellors want to help as they understand the importance of slowing things down to find out more about the relationship and the reason things are going wrong. Therefore, it is important to spend some time with counsellors to help them understand about the issues and give them enough time to come up with something that may improve the issues.
Honesty is the foundation of any relationship but many people make the mistake of thinking that if they are honest about various things in their relationship, it may hurt their relationship. Relationship experts encourage people to be honest. Honest communication is extremely important to build a lasting relationship and if you are not honest with your partner or are not willing to share, it is not likely that counselling will be of any help to you. It is important for you to not hold back during the counselling sessions to have a chance at success. At the same time give yourself a chance to trust your therapist and build rapport, which will help the opening up process.
One of the major factors that affect any relationships is lack of communication or inadequate communication. When you are in a session with the counsellor, it is important to tell the counsellor in case you feel that something is not getting communicated properly. If you disagree with something or do not understand the concerns of your partner, you should bring it to the attention of the counsellor and make sure that you understand everything.
Invest Time in Your Relationships
Counselling isn’t going to work in case you do not take time to invest in your relationships. Counselling acts as a support structure that works only if you attend the sessions regularly and prioritise your appointments. During the counselling sessions, subtle changes will start happening automatically. In simple terms, you will start noticing more space to do things together with your partner and less tension in the relationship.
You may also find that you are opening up and the shame and guilt that has built up in the relationship is slowly going away. You will start feeling safe but it is extremely important for you to regularly attend the counselling sessions for it to work.
Overall, these are some of the things that you need to keep in mind while you undergo relationship counselling. Do not forget that you need to hire the services of a reputable and trusted counsellor to make sure that he or she makes a relationship work for you. However, the onus is on you and your partner to make the relationship work.
Counselling isn’t a miracle pill that you and your partner can take to sort out all the issues. You will need to work on it and invest time in your relationship if you are serious about your relationship.