Marriage is one of those institutions where people love their spouse and will stick with them through thick and thin. The problem is the people who are not committed tend to have problems staying married, even when they love their spouse. Here are some marriage counselling principles to ensure they are properly prepared for the counselling they are going to be taking.
Expect To Be Satisfied
A common misconception with marriage counselling is that it simply does not work. In fact, their are some surveys that have reported that over ninety percent of the people who sought counselling felt like they were satisfied with the results of the counselling, but also felt like they obtained the tools they need to make life livable again. So this is a great thing for people to look at because it often means they will leave happy as well. It can also be helpful to talk to other people about their experiences and gain a recommendation.
Speed Of Results Is Often Faster
Sometimes people will think that going to a counsellor on an individual basis is better for them. However, they need to realise this often takes a longer time to get the results that people want to see. With the couple going to counselling at the same time, though, it will allow people the time in getting the tools together and also know more about the problems as a couple and how they can be coped with. Its important to say that if your partner is unwilling to attend then attending individually is a good start to create positive change.
Cost Can Be An Issue
A major cause for marital problems is finances of the family. When this is the case, people tend to want to avoid having to spend any money to get the counselling they are told they need to have. So people need to make sure they know the counsellors they are seeing are affordable and within your budget.
Focuses On The Emotions In The Marriage
With most of the marriage counseling people will find that it is going to focus more on the emotions that people are feeling. This may not be something that people tend to express in front of others, but with the counselors they have a tendency to be more open about their emotions. This way people are able to have a good life and know they were able to get all of their feelings out and let the other people know how they really feel. So this could help people in getting to know more about how they are seen and how the other person feels about them and ultimately resolve their issues.
Counselling May Point Out Different Approaches
As was mentioned earlier, marriage counseling tends to be successful because people feel like they obtained the tools they need to deal with their problems. Since this is the case, people need to realise the counseling may be able to give them the tools and approaches to look at situations differently. This in turn will let people go back and look at their problems time and time again and start to see how they can respond to them differently. These simple changes may be enough to save the marriage.
Counselling May End In Divorce
A sad fact is that even with the best marriage counselling in the world, their are some relationships that simply cannot be saved because they are so toxic or that the problems have been going on too long without intervention. With that being the case, people need to be open to the fact the marriage they are in may not be the right one for them. Since this is the case, the therapist or the counselor may recommend some of the changes to see if they will help the relationship out or not.
However, their are some points when the counsellor may lead to them recommending people to considering a different avenue of approach and that could be divorce. This is usually based on very clear reasons on where the individuals are at. So it is easy to see that even with the counseling it is not always going to save every marriage, especially if people obtain help too late.
When people are married, they need to realize their are going to be quite a few ups and downs. The problem is when people are on the downward slide at times they may think their marriage is over and automatically jump right to a divorce situation. This is not going to help save the marriage at all, but instead can cause a lot of grief for people. Before people jump to this, though, they need to try marriage counselling to see if this is an option that can help.