When you are going through a divorce, you will need to understand that children will be impacted by the changes. By going through this divorce, you are splitting your family in two, and even the most amicable divorce will leave scars that need to be healed. Because of this, you will need to take it upon yourself to make sure that you are minimising the impact of your divorce, while still protecting your children. By taking advantage of some of the information below, you will be able to frame your divorce in a way that makes sense and to help the children cope with it.
#1: Kids May Have Abandonment Issues
One of the risk factors of a divorce is that it can create abandonment issues for your children. These abandonment issues may manifest in many different ways and cause your children to be more fearful. One of the best things you can do for your child in order to cope with the risk of this abandonment fear is to keep them informed every step of the way and go to counselling if you have concerns.
#2: Your Children May Have A Harder Time Having Relationships With Each Parent
When you think of the effects of divorce on children, one thing to be mindful is that your child may have a difficult time trying to make a separate relationship with each parent in separate households. Even the best visitation and custody schedule will not be the same as having both parents living under your roof. Because of this, both parents should make an extra effort to not undermine each other and to make sure that they can foster relationships and encourage relationships with the other parent.
#3: The Divorce May Reinforce Patterns That Make It Difficult For Your Children To Have Healthy Relationships
Another risk factor associated with divorce is that children may find it difficult to have healthy relationships as they grow. This relates to fears or insecurities as they may be mistrustful of getting close to people, which can be a common pattern of children who have gone through a family break-up. While your child is not guaranteed to exhibit these sorts of issues, it is important to recognize that this kind of significant change can create this risk. Please keep in mind that it is no reflection on you as a parent however you can try and minimise the impact of the changes.
You will be able to help your child cope with these sorts of issues when you have open and honest communication. By having the communication open and consistent, minimising conflict and encouraging children to express their feelings you will best be able to help your child through it. Its also important to spend quality time with your children, ensure they have quality time with each parent and have a sense of predictability about what is happening.